Incredible recipe

Zak’s Famous Chopped Vegetable Feta Salad

This recipe was invented by me (hence the name) and was inspired by Israeli and Serbian salad.

Ingredients:

Cucumber (a big one or two small ones)
Bell Pepper (green, yellow and red; one of each)
Red Onion
Tomato (two, not too ripe but preferably a bit firm)
Feta cheese
Goat cheese
Olive oil
Lemons or limes (two)
Balsamic vinaigrette
Love

Directions:

Dice vegetables finely. I mean finely. No big chunks. Don’t be lazy. With the cucumber you must remove the mushy, seedy center; same with the tomatoes. Too much mushy shit will make the salad too watery. Place all of this in a shallow yet wide container so that once the veggies are mixed and evened out they are about one and half inches deep. Juice the lemons or limes over the veggies. Add a little olive oil and balsamic vinaigrette. Mix it up well. Sprinkle cheeses on top so that it creates about a quarter inch-thick covering.

Remember, it is important to dice the veggies finely because every bite should contain multiple pieces of vegetable and bits of cheese.

Everybody who has ever tried this salad has fallen in love with it. You will too, I promise.

(If you don’t fall in love with my salad it’s because you done fucked it up somehow when you were preparing it)